Photography

....Nokia 808 is simply perfect for my hobby <3 <3 <3

Facebook Shoutouts - Poems by accident :p

Writing poems is my cup of tea so I always have a small notebook and a pen with me wherever I am. But there are times, when in a hurry, I forget to bring my "best friends" and when an idea pops up, I find myself cramming to jot it down. So, to avoid losing what I think is a kind of poem or even expression, I use my Facebook wall as my notebook. And here are some stuffs I've written over the years...

Most of my themes here are about a certain someone who likes to make fun of me, love, society, isolation, bullying, hope.... :p

"some women these days destroy themselves and change their whole identity just to harbor fame and admiration from others. Without their fake selves, they're just mere shadows among the crowd of busy people. Vanity is at its peak"

"Themis is the goddess of divine Justice. Her symbol is a woman holding a scale with her eyes blindfolded. Her visage implies that justice sides no one and it is just and fair. It sides the right and punishes the wrong. But the dark side of justice is...It is blind and it doesn't know the truth. The weight on its scale depends on the weight of lies and fortune spent. This is not "divine" justice...this is "human" justice - justice that can be bought by what is inside your pocket"

"Do u know why flowers and stars are both beautiful? It's because they can never see each other shine. At night, the stars shine and only night flowers can see their light and in the morning, the flowers bloom and only morning stars can see their resplendence. They are fated never to see each other but while their longing grows, they make both the sky and the earth beautiful. Their melancholy creates beauty but how I wish they could...see each other even for once..."

"When a star and the moon are together, the moon, who has its light from the sun, outshines the star. But using a telescope, you'll see that a mere dot in the sky is actually a galaxy of clustered stars and planets"

"Fake a smile and force a laugh...pretend that you are okay for no one can ever make you feel brighter. In the end, this desolation will eat all of what remains in your heart 'til the very last drop of hope and bliss. You want to scream but it's a futile attempt to do so because no one can ever hear your voiceless scream. In the end...whom am I going to rely on other than myself?"

"Life is ephemeral and we are nothing but fleeting beings in the ever-flowing sands of time. As our souls linger while being trapped in a vessel, we gradually unfold the book of our life and every page is stored deep in our memories. When our vessels are gone, we exist in the hearts of those who are still here and knowing that we are remembered, we can live on"

"I've been having déjàvu since last week...it makes me wonder about my repetitive life cycle. Was I alive in the "past" and now doing the same thing I did before? or this is just a mere feeling of someone caught in the center of monotony?"

"I won't follow the flow of society like a systematic human being. If success can be measured through people's achievement and by achieving what they also achieve, what can you call those who defy the norms and somehow manage to shine using their own light? I won't let this robotic system to monopolize and manipulate me"

"Waking up before sunrise with tears in my eyes is one of the saddest memories I have when I met you. Only in my dreams could I talk to you and that dream is one of the fondest memories I have. I am not the one fated to be with you so now I will look ahead and with firm belief, I know I'll meet the one fated to be with me ♥"

"Do I have to prove to you my worth? The answer is no. I wasn't born for you or for other people, I was born to complete my task and write my own story. I am what I am and the way I want to be. It's my right...it's my freedom"

"Do not treat a woman like a flower. Keep in mind that flower's beauty is ephemeral and when it withers it loses its radiance so is your affection. When you love a woman, treat her like she's the only woman in the entire universe for deep in her heart, that's what she longs for....everyone longs for...."

"I want to become a wonderful woman five years from now...Not for you but for myself because that is what i want to be. I am still a flowerless tree but when spring comes, i will shower the world with my petals, dance as the wind blows, journey along with the river that flows. And to protect you with all my might...forever...."

"He was all that I ever needed. He needed someone but that someone wasn't me...and would never be....even so, I do not resent him or hate because by meeting him, I came to love myself more. Pain is just only for a while. Learn to appreciate the lessons taught for we are still young and we need it as our strong foundation..."

"Woke up from another nightmare. Is there something more horrifying than seeing your other self standing right in front of you and looking straight at your eyes and tell you "I hate everything about you - you and your whole existence" and out of the blue, a little girl throws stone at you and you run after her only to realize that she looks exactly like you when you were a child?!"

"Indeed, revenge is sweet. A wounded tiger is more dangerous than any other beasts. If he survives from a sudden attack of bunch of animals, he suffers the pain while licking his wounds and nursing himself back but he doesn't forget the score that he must settle. And once fully recovered, he pounces his enemy one by one until they are all obliterated. That's one thing I admire about tigers!"

"One best way to know who is true and who is fake is to pretend that you know nothing. Let them tell you facts and lies and when they disguise their insults with smiles and flowery lies, smile back but look at their eyes and see right through them. By nature, some predators pretend to be asleep to lure their prey; others make a lovely sound to lure them out. Because if they use force, their target might run off and they have to exhaust themselves just to capture their prey which is, sometimes, a failed attempt"

"I don't want to live a life of illusion so I do things I love to do the most despite being labeled "weird", "childish" or sometimes, people's words get worse but it doesn't really matter. At least, I don't have to worry how to meet other people's expectation; I don't have to restrain myself from doing things I love the most. I don't have to weave stories just to have them listen to me and even like me. I don't have to tag along just to show people that I'm "in""

"One of the reasons why childhood must never be forgotten...One day, when all of the strands of our hair turn silvery white, we will no longer look forward to what is yet to come...only the past will interest us"

"People showing off the extravagant life they are living - those expensive stuffs - branded bags - elegant and high-class restaurants they go to?....seriously...what can they possibly gain by doing so? Being envied? Admired? but what's the point of all that?! Does making others feel that you're BETTER than them make you feel happy? In the end, you're just living your life unconsciously craving for attention"

"You think you're the queen of the stage , reigning and devouring those foolish souls' insecurities but you're no good yourself. Is it fun to look on down on others just because you THINK they are nothing compare to what you have? A little advice, Missy... You don't own the world and it doesn't revolve around you and every pain you inflict on others, be it through words or through your making fun of them, you'll pay it DEARLY. And those you've hurt? They'll be so happy that they can't even stop laughing right in front of your crestfallen face"

"after seeing the suffering of others and their giving up in the end, I came to realize that my life is mine so I must never let outsiders take control of what I feel, of what can make me happy, of what is the best for me, of what is right or wrong because in the end, when nothing goes right anymore, can I blame them for manipulating my life? No. I can only blame myself for believing them!"

"why do I always make a fool out of myself when I obviously know that what I am about to do is either stupid or wrong? How can I ever explain what I am thinking to those who think that I am a big idiot? They won't get my point even if I explain it to them. But does it really matter? I know myself and my worth well enough so there's no need for me to get affected by what others think of me"

"in the end, the people I trust who push me forward will be the ones to push me down the floor and laugh at my pathetic face if I were to be a disappointment. I won't accept people saying that I am wrong because I've seen those dreadful eyes staring back at me"

"Was the sunshine after the storm a symbol of hope or an insult to those who have suffered?"

-posted from writerscafe.org

A Home That Waits For Your Return

I stand on a cliff,

Holding the remains of broken hour glass.

The waves coming from afar,

Crush on the edge.

It's screaming 

The names of the world

Lost in time.

The ocean may wash everything away

Still, it returns

All that was taken away

From our motherland.

I raise my hands

Toward the infinite heaven.

I sing a song

As the wind blows

To take the sands 

Away from my palm.

I pray for the wind

To send it to you.

When it blows from the north,

Though from another direction,

It returns again.

Like the land 

That awaits for her lover, the sea,

These hands reach out

To the unseen thread

That binds our soul.

Even the river that has dried out

Comes back again

As rain from the sky.

And even flowers

Bloom in the night;

Waiting for a passer-by.

Even the forest holds on

To the fleeting image of a loved one.

So, my dearest,

Like the wind,

Return to the place

Where longing seems no end.

Cross the vast, blue ocean

And set-off on a voyage

Against the tide.

I keep singing,

Wishing that when my song ends,

You'll come back to me

For you are my home

As I am to you...

Poetry ~ Window To My Soul ~ The Way I See Humanity

"One thing that gave me this lasting impression ( in a sad way) was when I saw a group of young girls…they were busy applying make up. At first I thought they were just sitting there but I was shocked when a car stopped in front of them, and they came rushing toward it. Then, a middle-aged man took a younger girl, I think she’s 14. I was young and foolish so I didn't know what was happening. I asked my cousin and my brother what those girls were up to but they just gripped both my hands...It was later that day when I was told that those girls were...prostitutes… and that’s how I came up with this poem"

"Moonlight Flowers"

The sun sets in the south,
dusk to midnight, smokes float in the air,
The scent of money in the sky,
Moves the flowers in the garden of the night.
Come, butterflies, come…
Come taste the sweet nectar

Of the gentle flowers of the night.
Flowers of nameless existence…
Ah, look, there are those that are not yet
              in full bloom,
But butterflies…they feed their nectar,
Moan in the unexplained pleasure…
They drink in the sea of ecstasy.

Oh, flowers of the night,
Go, bloom under the moonlight…
Buds of ruined innocence,
All for the taste of painful pleasure…
All for the sake of filthy rectangular confetti
That can fertilize the soil where they bloom
     And live like a withered roses left in a silent grave.
After the pleasure, the butterflies fly away
While flowers gather the filthy treasure.

Their soft, fragile petals are all stained
With the stars’ tears of blood.
Not even the rain can wash the sin away…
Not even the falling stars can grant their wish.
Beauty, colors, innocence,money, luxurious pleasure,
Though these flowers smile, 

who knows what their tears mean?
Will that be pain? Sweet sensation? Joy? Emptiness? Regret?

In the garden under the moonlight,
There are flowers blooming in the night.
Butterflies come! Bring the scent of money here!
Come embrace these beautiful flowers,
Love the pleasure but not the heart,
Their moans are the butterflies’ sensation,
But how about tears?
Butterflies, don’t come caressing the flowers
      THAT ARE NOT YET IN FULL BLOSSOM
OR THEY WILL WILT BEFORE THEY BLOOM!
They scream but not because it’s pleasurable!
They scream because that’s what kills their pride and vanity…

When the clock strikes midnight,
Flowers in the moonlight garden bloom.
Stars in the velvet, night curtain
Are sparkling like diamonds in the dark city.

…come butterflies, come! Come taste the nectar of sin!
Come dance with the flowers under the red moonlight!
…come…dance…filthy flowers…dance…
For not even the morning dews
Can cleanse and wash everything away…

Poetry ~ Window To My Soul ~ Emotions I Can't Express

 ~ Drifting Far Away~

lost in the heart of a crowded city

....everyone has places to go to...

           destinations they hope to reach soon...

trap themselves inside the four-walled monster...

....streets with so many road arrows...

....................pointing everywhere....

but they sure find their way...

their eyes so full of life....

                                    but she doesn't know the name of the street

she is going to...so many streets...signs....so confusing...

but how do people know where to go?

she....just blends in

but she always stands out

......her face a flower....

her smile so bright

....her reddish brown eyes never gleam....

she laughs with everyone....

but she's always so far away....so near and yet so far...

she's here...but....she....

isn't

exactly

here....

....................................................................

 ~ Voiceless~
Her voice was like the Angel's melody
That could heal the heart's malady.
How jealous were the seraphims
While concealing their darkness through their whims.
A peach that promises eternity
Was sent in her chamber with utmost secrecy.
Delighted for such a gift of immortality,
She ate the Seed that rooted her endless melancholy.
Unable to sing, she watched the dawning of the day
And cursed all the Angels with words she couldn't say...
.........................................................................
~ Nameless Existence ~ 

A nameless existence
Dwells in the castle of ruins.
When thunder strikes,
Mirror falls crashing down.
She begins her soliloquy,
Acting like an radical goddess,
Pretending to gather
Specks of hope
In the dust-covered floor.
Breaking. The sound of her heart breaking
She’s losing her grip
Her eyes are lifeless
With dirty, wounded hands astir,
Searching for a small light from the dust.
A nobody under the sun
Gazes upon the one she loves.
He walks without hesitation,
Unaware of those eyes
Silently wishing from afar.
With her faltered voice,
She speaks to the world

But she can't even hear
Her own voice.
Her visage in ruins,
Like her castle in gray.
No sun ever shines,
And no moon ever appears
In this world where sorrow lies.
A crestfallen soul
Will forever wander
In the world behind the reality…

Poetry ~ Window To My Soul ~ Remember Me

 "I awoke from a distant dream...In my dream, I was a child again...watching the early morning sky beside my late grandmother...listening to the song of a morning bird and it brought me tears...Such a sweet memory brings so much bitter-sweet emotion"

Remember me like the sun
That rises from the horizon
Like a paint of gold that spills
All over the dark sheet of the night
Like the fleeting clouds
Above a world that is still and unchanging
Remember me like waking from a slumber
Unable to recall a lovely dream
Like once a beautiful house
In time abandoned and forgotten
Remember me like the mist
That bathes the grasses with dew
Like the gust of wind
That blows but never comes back
Like a moving scenery
A sleepy-eyed traveler sees on his long journey
Like a wonderful song
Buried deep in the heart and can't be sung
Remember me like the moon
That fades into the dawn of daybreak
Like the purple sky
Lasting only for ephemeral
Like the melancholy
Felt in a gray, rainy afternoon
Remember the sunshine
When thinking of the bright days
The laughter
In a paradise of light-sleepers
The happy times
Of my being clumsy - the silly one in your eyes
Feel the happiness
As you relive the past in your nostalgia
And if perchance
The memories bring you tears
Then, remember me not
But I would still be here
In this field where wildflowers bloom
Playing in the sun
Free and innocent again
Living in halcyon days
And forever remembering you...

Poetry ~ Window To My Soul ~ Quiet Night

"Castle Far Away"

In the castle far, far away

Two shadows dance

In the palely illuminated hall.

They twirl in circles

And they never let go 

Of each other's hands...

 .............................

"In This Quiet Night"

In this quiet night

I think of someone

Of a palace

Of a hall bathed

In silvery moonlight

Of two silhouettes dancing 

The sound of wind chimes

Hums from afar

Is their only melody

~ A waltz under the moon...